Sometimes I will write a facebook wall post and it will lead to other thoughts and other posts in a spiderwebby wibbly wobly... eh screw it here is what I wrote last night, with some edits.
Yep this sums up my current mood.
Ah nothing says "I will conquer you, crush your every hope and your every dream. I will eviscerate you at my whim. I will salt your farms. I will burn your libraries. I will not only end you but end even the knowledge of your existence" like the good or (not so good) imperial march
Okay I'm officially starting to scare myself.
Then again.
On the one hand no one fears nice guys. For once in my life I would like to have someone go. "You know what? Greg is someone you don't want to piss off." That would be nice. Just once. On the other. I know my darker inclinations and I don't like them. I know my brain on evil and it a'int nice.
I'm a stone cold cynic. Oh, I try to act like I'm not, but there's a part of me, a big part, that thinks that in this world if you want to get anything done, in this world if you want to come out on top, in this world if you don't want to be the small and the weak hoping to just get by and not get pushed around and had by the bigger men, you got to do a little dirt.
But, I've already had my Scrooge realization.
What I would prefer is respect. Fear can lead to respect but fear can also lead to hatred and I like being liked too much.
The question I have to ask myself is in this day and age, in a non-violent and for that matter non-sociopathic way, how does someone become a badass.
By gum I think I've got it. I shall re-familiarize myself with the ways of the Vulcan. Though that brings its own set of problems.
At the end of the day I just wish people would realize I am not a tame lion.
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