Den of the Cyphered Wolf

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

We've Commoditized Freedom

I don't think people understand me. Normally whining about "waaa nobody gets me" is exactly the type of thing that makes me want to kick my own ass. But it's starting to occur to me that I have a fundamentally different worldview than the people around me and that's worth exploring. So here goes.

The greatest frustration of my life is that there are all these things I want to do. That I have detailed plans to do. That I can't. I'm patient and have hope that I'll get to them eventually so I try not to be bitter about it but that doesn't mean it doesn't bother me.

I spend almost every second of every hour of everyday thinking about WHY. Why can't things just be as simple as "DO THE THING!"

The simple truth is that everything takes resources. Time, money, manpower, knowlege. It all takes something and the way the universe works resources are finite. Even if I had the resources to do what I want, which I almost never do I would have to consider other places those resources could go. And as a prince or a pauper that will always be the case.

I'm sorry but the hippies were wrong. Money does rule the world. I wish it didn't. I want to act is though it doesn't.  I find the idea of putting profit over people repugnant but and have struggled for my life to square the importance of the two.

Power, Authority, and Leverage

What will also always be the case is that I will never have the resources to do the sorts of things I want to do on my own. Everything whether I like it or not is going to come down to asking the permission of some gatekeeper, somebody who has the resources or at least the authority to use the resources.

Hell, that's what a job is. You ask somebody for permission to do a thing.

It's the way the world works. I dream of the day I can tell everybody screw you this is my call, I'm the boss, but honestly that gets tied up in who has the money. And as my capacity and ambition rise so does the need for more and more resources to the point that I'm never not going to be beholden to some economic stakeholder. I'm not exactly okay with that but again it's how the world works.

Still my dream is carte blanche. The day when I'm the guy with the keys to the money bin and can make the calls about what gets done and what don't and how.

That will be an interesting day.

Anyway until then I'm stuck in a world where for nearly everything I have to ask permission.


I am bristling even if I don't look like it.  (Dear god I wish Adam's speech was on Youtube.)
 I know what you feel... you feel smothered, trapped like an animal pure in its ferocity unable to actualize the urges within, clinging to one truth like flame struggling to burn within an enclosed glass, that a beast this powerful can not be contained. Inevitably it will break free and savage the land again.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 4 Episode 20 The Yoko Factor

Evil Tony Robbins indeed. I chose the nickname Wolf for a reason. I will break from my bonds and devour the world with the insatiable hunger I already feel in my bowels.

And I wonder why people are afraid of me?


As stated the thing that pisses me off is that is that my life isn't as simple as here is what I want to do. Here is what I'm going to do. And within reason, I think life should be that simple. Life is not that simple.

My greatest desire is merely the ability to express my will and act in my own interest without fear.

My greatest desire is freedom.

And from that point, it's only a hop, jump and a skip to not just wanting freedom for myself but for everybody.

EVERYBODY should be able to do that.

Wealth to me represents the capacity to act. Those with money can act and those without it can not. That is the way of the world and I must accept it but it still seems perverse especially when those with said capacity are so reluctant to relinquish it to others.

In a sick way, we've commoditized freedom.

Wealth is a form of power that can be leveraged to make people act against their will. I hate power imbalances that get people to act against their own will for reasons.

That's what equality is to me. The condition of no one being able to unduly compel or coerce anybody else against their will.  (So that's why I've been so obsessed with Camelot lately with the strong defending and guaranteeing the rights of weak, and all that jazz lately huh who knew.)

Miles. Fine vague broad humanistic ideals.

But back to my point. We've commoditized freedom, the capacity to act in one's own self-interest. I don't know how we fix it or how we even broke it or even if that is the way the world always worked, but it's wrong.

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